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PRESS Release 2001
For Immediate Release – Megastir is Lazy
Rupert West Quebec- Megastir announced to a stunned press gallery this morning that he is an extremely lazy person.
This announcement comes on the heels of almost ten days of relative inactivity from the industry stalwart and Brad
Pitt lookalike.
megastir is the sometimes-witty persona behind the industry website "2idiots.50megs.com".
His daily commentaries on the foibles and follies of amature fishermen and their idiot sidekicks has made him a
celebrity among at least nine people who dwell in remote areas of the world where cable television is not available.
"megastir" as he is known to his audience, called the press conference to discuss the almost-complete
absence of humor and/or personality at his internet address over the past few weeks. Speculation has been running
rampant among both the press and the public regarding Megastirs whereabouts, his frame of mind and his tranquilizer
dependency.
"When I started the 2idiots.50megs.com website, it was a daily website. I now update
it on a sesquicentennial basis. When I first started this site I wanted to offer something to the viewer that he
wasn’t getting anywhere else; a website with a light background and large, easily readable print."
At this point several members of the press switched off their tape recorders and stared at each other. Pushed further
for comment by bolder members of the press pool, megastir continued, "I dropped out of school at an early
age because I was too lazy to get up and walk to class. I was sick for years because I was too lazy to get a real
job. I got married at a young age because I was too lazy to date but I started my website with a diligence and
dedication not previously seen in my life. It appears to have been an aberration. I have since resumed a sloth-like
existence and spend most days staring pensively out of my window at an old oak tree that stands as a monument to
inactivity. It has stood there for probably a hundred years and hasn’t moved an inch. I want to be that oak tree".
With that, megastir abruptly called the press conference to a halt and muttered something about being afraid of
spiders before leaving the podium